Pineapple Express

ALMOST: (David Gordon Green) Well, at this point, this film came and lived out its time in the limelight a while ago... In fact, the statement it makes that it has taken me this long to come up with what to say should tell you a little bit about the motif encircling this little comedy. For those of you who haven't seen it, the synopsis is that of two unlikely acquaintances, a user and a seller. Both going nowhere, and with seemingly dead-end life situations. Seth Rogen and James Franco team up to play this funny pair, and venture into almost 2 hours of bickering, hugging, smoking and sometimes, crying. They happen to witness a crime that leaves them running for their lives and learning who their friends truly are. But wait, don't for a second think its emotional, touching, or remotely worth seeing... The humor is almost completely lost in the characters' pathetic attempts for it. The combination of poor hygeine and unhealthy habits never quite finds its way to endearing, and ultimately sens the message that smoking out was never as cool as you thought it was. Its sad, and because of that, the movie is long and ridiculous. Yes, you will chuckle a few times. Yes, you'll probably be overwhelmed at points with the urge to "relax" and yes, you will probably watch the entire thing. But, know that it isn't worth it, and there are funnier ways to spend your two hours. If you're in the mood for a plant-inspired chill-out, then watch something classic, like Dazed and Confused, or even How High - both worth at least a gram more. And lastly, if you do ignore my warnings and give this film a chance (for which I wouldn't judge you), know that James Franco will never be the handsome dude he once was (see, Milk). Scrawny bones and stringy hair plus a co-dependency on grandma do nothing for libido.